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The first time I met him, butterflies flew in my tommy. My innocent eyes twinkled with all pleasure. Oh, this new neighbour of ours looks just like a Roman god, I thought in my childish heart. His strong, angular face was so handsome. I kept smiling at him.
He flashed strong white teeth at me, and I was completely lost.
The mirror became my companion after that. My room became my runway. I posed this way and that, just to choose the right look for my Roman god.
Compliments rolled off him like raindrops on a rainy day. I couldn’t get enough of his praises.
Mama noticed. She saw my swaying hips when I walked. She saw the light in my eyes when he got back from work.
Mama cautioned me. “Finish your secondary school, dear child.”
My ears were deaf to her. I had the opportunity to be cherished and nurtured by my Roman god. I couldn’t give it up for anything. It didn’t matter to me that I was in my final class in secondary school.
My heart was lost to my Roman god. When he requested for my purity, I consented.
His request came with promises of marriage, a better life with all my heart desired. A life away from Mama’s watchful eyes, away from Papa’s belt for every wrong, and away from siblings trying to prove themselves to the world. I chose the world with my Roman god.
All too soon, I became sick in the morning. Mama gave me drugs with great suspicion in her eyes.
When my sickness in the morning continued for days, I had to stand before the doctor to listen to the consequence of the request I granted my Roman god.
The atmosphere became charged, and fireworks exploded in the house.
My cheek became a drum set as Papa landed slap after slap on it.
Hot tears found their way down my cheeks. My mouth trembled as I told them who was behind my sickness in the morning.
My Roman god stood before my family, head bent in shame and told the truth.
My things were arranged in a Ghana-must-go bag, and I was sent away with my Roman god.
The compliments stopped coming. The smiles refused to form. The face of my Roman god could rival the solidity of Olumo rock.
The beast became a Prince for Beauty, but my own Prince became a Beast.
I became the reason for every mistake. I became a good spot where anger could be unleashed.
Believe me, Soul Sister, his anger was unleashed regularly, and my little body took it all in pain and regret.
Along came our little one, and my Roman god softened like baby lotion. It remembered so until SHE came around.
She was the new employee in his office. He was drawn to her beauty and intelligence like bee to honey.
He sang her praises to my sad ears. He pointed her qualities that I could never have to my frustrated face.
Was I educated? Oh no.
Was I intelligent? Oh no.
Was I smart? The answer you know.
Was I experienced? Ah, Soul Sister, no.
What was my contribution to the family expenses? Zilch!
I swallowed the bitter taste of truth down my closed throat like Yoyo Bitters.
Seasons changed, and my life changed.
My Roman god packed my things into the same Ghana-must-go bag and sent me back to my father.
Papa would not accept me. He told me to go to my husband.
My Roman god told Papa he never asked for my hand in marriage. Nothing was legal between us.
Oh, what shame!
Papa spat on me and called me names that only a useless daughter like me deserved.
Seasons have changed again, Soul Sister, and baby is growing. My life is just taking shape, but I just heard my Roman god is getting married to the woman of his dreams.
My fingers are on my lips in regret as I write. The tears in my eyes are telling the tale of my shame. I stirred my love when it was not time.
Dear Soul Sister, what should I do? Do I have the right to stop the wedding? What would be my lot now?